she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
