Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
