So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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