does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
