You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
