Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
