Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
