if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
organizing the empties. That sober.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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