Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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