so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
