The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
