sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
