If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize