I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
