I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
