on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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