Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
