this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
