I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize