One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
