He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Randomize
