So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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