You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
