it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Randomize
