I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
