How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
