I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
