Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
