Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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