Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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