Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize