I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize