Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
