discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
