thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
either way he was missing a nipple.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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