dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
