you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
