They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I smell stomach acid.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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