I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize