one might say we're banned from that church
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
