Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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