I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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