thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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