Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
