My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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