...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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