Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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