So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
