Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
