I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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