Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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