If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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